Tuesday, December 1, 2009


A snapshot of my morning for the past 21 days.

Me: Do you want milk?
Gabriel: Waaaaahhh!

Me: Do you want some cereal?
Gabriel: Uuuuuhhhhh!

Me: Let's play with your blocks.
Gabriel: No!

Me: Let's read a book.
Gabriel: Mmmmaaaamamamamama!

The whine.

I hate whining. I know I'm not alone. In fact, most people probably find this part of childhood particularly annoying. But for me, it's on a whole different level. Constant whining is my idea of life in hell.

Dictionary.com defines "whine" as:

1. to utter a low, usually nasal, complaining cry or sound, as from uneasiness, discontent, peevishness, etc.
2. to snivel or complain in a peevish, self-pitying way

Peevish, self-pitying. Yep. That would describe what I've been hearing on a constant basis for the last 3 weeks. The sound of that "uuuuuhhhhhhh......" all day long in that distinct pitch of voice makes me want to set myself on fire.

Right now I'm working on a cure for whining. So far I'm 0 for 458. Is there hope? Is there relief from this stage? If your answer is "when they're 18 and out of your house," you are not helpful. Try again.


  1. What works well for me you probably can't use until he's older. I say, "I don't like listening to you when you use that voice." And then I leave the room.

    Another thing that works is to speak in a calm, low voice so he has to stop whining to listen. And this is the hardest: you have to absolutely avoid whining yourself. That means no whining when you say, "Stop your whinnningg!"

  2. I'm pretty sure setting yourself on fire would just result in YOU beginning to whine..."Unnnngh, Michael, my body is in paaaaaain all ooooooooooo-ver."