Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Stopthewhining.com

A snapshot of my morning for the past 21 days.

Me: Do you want milk?
Gabriel: Waaaaahhh!

Me: Do you want some cereal?
Gabriel: Uuuuuhhhhh!

Me: Let's play with your blocks.
Gabriel: No!

Me: Let's read a book.
Gabriel: Mmmmaaaamamamamama!

The whine.

I hate whining. I know I'm not alone. In fact, most people probably find this part of childhood particularly annoying. But for me, it's on a whole different level. Constant whining is my idea of life in hell.

Dictionary.com defines "whine" as:

1. to utter a low, usually nasal, complaining cry or sound, as from uneasiness, discontent, peevishness, etc.
2. to snivel or complain in a peevish, self-pitying way

Peevish, self-pitying. Yep. That would describe what I've been hearing on a constant basis for the last 3 weeks. The sound of that "uuuuuhhhhhhh......" all day long in that distinct pitch of voice makes me want to set myself on fire.

Right now I'm working on a cure for whining. So far I'm 0 for 458. Is there hope? Is there relief from this stage? If your answer is "when they're 18 and out of your house," you are not helpful. Try again.

2 comments:

  1. What works well for me you probably can't use until he's older. I say, "I don't like listening to you when you use that voice." And then I leave the room.

    Another thing that works is to speak in a calm, low voice so he has to stop whining to listen. And this is the hardest: you have to absolutely avoid whining yourself. That means no whining when you say, "Stop your whinnningg!"

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  2. I'm pretty sure setting yourself on fire would just result in YOU beginning to whine..."Unnnngh, Michael, my body is in paaaaaain all ooooooooooo-ver."

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